Best year of my life! (So far!)

Exactly one year ago today, I was supposed to be at Disneyland with Bailey to help with a grad night event, but those plans were cancelled.  Instead, I joined some friends for dinner in Lakewood.  During dinner, the subject of teaching at missionary schools came up as some of the girls at the table have considered this in their futures.  I was not one of them.  I already knew about KICS from Lisa Sudman, and as her daughter was at the table, we spent some time talking about the school.  Quietly I got out my iPhone and sent Lisa an email asking her about available positions and other details.  Not for myself of course, but for any of my interested friends!  We emailed back and forth a few times, and she gave me a lot of good info.   I'll admit that my heart beat a little faster when I read that KICS was looking for a middle school math and/or Bible teacher.  Interesting.

That night as I went to bed, I picked up my copy of Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  For the past few years, the word “obedience” often came to mind as I reflected on my relationship with God.  This book was definitely changing my small worldview of what it meant to be obedient.  I had been working on the book for a while.  It’s not one of those books one can or should rush through.  As I read that night, the words deeply convicted me.  Would I be willing and obedient to leave my job, family, friends, church, community, and comfort to follow Christ?  No.  I said it aloud. 

Why did I feel so upset?  I’ve been blessed with a great job, community and church.  Jesus would not ask me to leave that, why would He?  But, what if… ?

Obviously, my heart was changed as I just spent the last year teaching grade 6 in Kigali.  Leaving some of these blessings, even if just for a year, has helped me to learn and grow and find a new word to focus on, ‘confidence’.   There were so many new blessings to discover in Kigali, many that I’ve already written about.  Saying ‘Yes’ to this opportunity has given my faith great confidence.  And now, as I return from Rwanda, I plan to live my life with that new confidence.

Amazing what can happen in 365 days.  I wonder what will happen in the next 365… can’t wait to find out!

Worst Day of the Year

It wasn't a bad day at all. It was a great day, with great kids, and lots of fun things to celebrate the end of the school year.

I don't know if my brain ever really shut down last night, and by 4:30 this morning I was wide awake. As I laid in bed I couldn't wrap my brain around the fact that "today is the last day of school". I got up early and went to school to take care of some last minute things.

The kids all showed up at 8, quite excited for the movie (though they didn't know what we would be watching), and heavy-laden with snacks and kool-aid. Before the movie, we reviewed our Time-Capsule documents from the first day of school and took some time to reflect and write how we'd grown over the year. We also measured to see how much we'd physically grown! One boy grew 3 ½ inches!! (And one girl, besides myself, did not grow at all.) It was really neat to see the kids excitement over how much they'd learned and grown this year. We also had our last time to share prayer requests. Their hearts are very compassionate, and it was so neat to hear them bring up their concerns: sick family members, family/friends affected by the tornado(s) in Missouri and now beyond, conflicts in North Africa and the middle east, and praises for a good year of school. As they prayed, I just silently wept and smiled, thanking God myself for such a beautiful year and such sweet children.

The surprise movie was "Horton Hears a Who" as Horton was our class mascot this year. During the movie I happened to look up as one boy was about to crawl on his desk, and appeared to be reaching out for the girl in front of him. I was about to stop him, when another boy drew my attention to what was going on. There was a grasshopper in the girl's hair! She didn't know - so the boy was trying to grab it before it made a scene! He was very successful and took the little green guy outside and let him fly away. The whole situation made me smile.

After the movie, we did some final clean-up and then we watched the DVD I made for the kids. It consists of several short video clips I took of them throughout the year, and one slideshow with all my pictures of them. I cried - they laughed! But it was good - crying through the slideshow helped me make it through our last class prayer.

We went to our final elementary chapel at the end of the day. Each class chose a favorite song to share - my class chose 'To God be the Glory'. Yep - love those kids! And, the other classes made cards for my kids and said a special prayer for them as this was their last elementary chapel as next year they will be in middle school! It was a very special time.

The goodbyes weren't so hard after that - lots of good hugs. I will some kids tomorrow night at graduation and have to say goodbye again, but I know it will be ok. I spent the afternoon packing and cleaning up my classroom. It was a little overwhelming to see it so bare and empty, but still simple and beautiful. I will miss my class very much.

So no, it was not a bad day, but it definitely was the worst day of the year!

To God be the Glory

To God be the glory, great things He has done

So loved He the world, that He gave us His Son

Who yielded His life an atonement for sin

And opened the life-gate that all may go in!

Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! Let the earth hear his voice!

Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! Let the people rejoice!

Oh come to the Father through Jesus the Son

And give Him the glory, great things He has done!

Great things He has taught us, great things He has done

And great our rejoicing through Jesus the Son

But purer and higher and greater will be

Our wonder, our transport, when Jesus we see!

Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! Let the earth hear his voice!

Praise the Lord! Praise the Lord! Let the people rejoice!

Oh come to the Father through Jesus the Son

And give Him the glory, great things He has done!

Leaving

Hold My Heart - Tenth Avenue North

How long must I pray, must I pray to You
How long must I wait, must I wait for You
How long 'till I see Your face
See You shining through

I'm on my knees
Begging You to notice me
I'm on my knees
Father, will You turn to me, yeah?

One tear in the dropping rain
One voice in a sea of pain
Could the Maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breaking heart?

One life is all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Would You come close and hold my heart?

I've been so afraid, afraid to close my eyes
So much can slip away before I say goodbye
But if there's no other way
I'm done asking why

So many questions without answers
Your promises remain
I can't see but I'll take my chances
To hear You call my name
To hear You call my name

One tear in the dropping rain
One voice in a sea of pain
Could the Maker of the stars
Hear the sound of my breaking heart?

One life is all I am
Right now I can barely stand
If You're everything You say You are
Would You come close and hold my heart?

Hold my heart
Could You hold my heart?
Hold my heart

Arms that Hold the Universe - Fee

I know it seems
Like this could be
The darkest day you've known
But believe you me
The God of strength
Will never let you go
He will overcome, I know

And the arms that hold the universe
Are holding you tonight
You can rest inside
It's gonna be alright
And the voice that calmed the raging sea
Is calling you His child
So be still and know He's in control
He will never let you go

Through many dangers, toils and snares
You have already come
His grace has brought you safe this far
(And) His grace will lead you home

And the arms that hold the universe
Are holding you tonight
You can rest inside
It's gonna be alright
And the voice that calmed the raging sea

Is calling you His child
So be still and know He's in control
He will never let you go

You can hope, you can rise, you can stand
He has still got the whole world in His hands
You can hope, you can rise, you can stand
He's still got the whole world, the whole world in His hands

And the arms that hold the universe
Are holding you tonight
You can rest inside
It's gonna be alright
And the voice that calmed the raging sea
Is calling you His child
So be still and know He's in control
He will never let you go

He will never let you go

(He's) Still got the whole world in His hands
in His hands, yeah
Still got the whole world in His hands

Countdown

May. My last month in Rwanda. In four weeks I'll be in London. In five weeks, California. Until this weekend I have tried to avoid the thoughts of packing and good-byes that must come soon, but I believe it is time to prepare for these realities.

Why I am sad:

I am leaving a beautiful country and city, with no current plans to return.

I am leaving students who have impacted me far greater than I could have ever expected. They are each a joy and blessing that will forever be precious memories for my soul. God sure knew what He was doing when He put us together for this year.

I am leaving a community of brothers and sisters who have shown me love, generosity, and friendship. I am grateful to have shared this year with men and women who are like-minded, and like-hearted, though we come from different backgrounds and experiences.

I am leaving a place where it is easy to remember and depend on God daily in all of life’s circumstances. Life is easier here (and by easy, I do not mean convenient!), as there is less noise and materialistic distractions. It has been a good rest for my soul to not have to daily fight my own culture.

Why I am excited:

I am coming home to my dearly missed family and friends. I am so grateful for their love and support while I have been off on this adventure for 10 months.

I am going to travel a lot over the summer to see many loved ones, attend weddings, and see many beautiful places in the US.

Food! American food! And by American, I mean Chinese and Mexican! ;)

I love the ocean, and I can’t wait to go walk the shores and listen to the waves again.

It is a sure thing that this year has changed a lot about how I view the world, and has challenged me to grow in many ways. I am excited to see how I can use these experiences to further the purpose of my teaching and life back home.

I knew this school year would go fast, and indeed, it speeds on!

Blessings~

Mom in Africa!

It's the last night of our Spring Break, and I'm looking ahead to just 6 short weeks of school before it's time to pack up and go. The closer this time comes, the more I find myself trying to find ways to hang onto the memories and experiences I've had here in Africa. During this break I got to make a lot of great memories with my mom, who came from California to spend 10 days with me experiencing life in Rwanda and Uganda. We made sure to take a lot of pictures and buy a few souvenirs to commit these experiences to memory.

My mom had a whirlwind trip, and I packed as much into her time as I thought possible. She arrived here on a Tuesday night and before I let her sleep after her 26 hour journey, I walked her around my neighborhood and introduced her to my bible study group. I was glad she got to see and meet them, and as I stood there I realized quite certainly how important this group has been to me this year. Every week we talk and sing and read and discuss and pray, and I know that this intimacy will be something I will miss after leaving Rwanda. I pray that I will be blessed to join or start a group like this next year.

My 6th grade class (my mom is in the back)

On Wednesday my mom joined me at school in the afternoon and helped with our grade 6 chapel. The kids have been very excited to meet her and to hear her play the piano in person (we listen to her CD in class). After school my mom and I visited the Rwandan Genocide Memorial. I had not been yet, so it was good to go with my mom and be able to process some of these tragic realities with her. While it is so painful to see how real evil is, in turn it is amazing to see the power of forgiveness and the healing that has occurred. The following day marked the 17th anniversary of the beginning of the genocide. The country chooses to take this time to remember so that it will not happen again.

We took motos home, an experience that my mom actually enjoyed, and joined friends for dinner and a bonfire. We had a bonfire at the boys house complete with s'mores (thanks Mom!) to kick off Spring Break. The first few days were spent relaxing at home and venturing out a little to the market and town to look at souvenirs. We also enjoyed an afternoon with Emmanuel (our helper) and his family. He brought his wife and kids for a few hours - they are a very sweet family!

On Saturday we went to the African Bagel Company for donuts and bagels, and then went to Amani Yu Juu, a place where women from broken backgrounds have been taught to sew, and they make lovely and unique items. We each picked up some beautiful Rwandan treasures!

After church on Sunday we went to the orphanage in town. I had not been in a few months and it was good to see the kids and how much they've grown! The older kids (2-5) went to play basketball, so as they were away, the nuns allowed us to go inside and bring the children with special needs out to the sunshine. I don't think this happens very often, so it was a blessing indeed, for all of us! I got to hold a little boy, Pacificique (Pass-if-ee-kay), and it was a joy to watch his eyes dart around taking in all of the action outside! The adoption process has been opened once again in Rwanda, so please pray that these little angels get to go 'home' soon!

Monday began our BIG adventure to Uganda. There were six of us in all, my roommates Hannah and Micki, Micki's parents, and my mom and me. We took a coach bus to the Ugandan border, and then had a driver, Dennis, pick us up to take us the rest of the way to Queen Elizabeth Park. It was a long, warm, dusty drive, but well worth it once we saw where we got to stay! Rwanda and southern Uganda are very hilly, so one can never see farther than a few miles in any direction. Kingfisher Lodge is on the side of a hill, one that overlooks all of Queen Elizabeth Park. The view was breathtaking - looking out over a vast savannah, across to Lakes Edward and Andrew and mountains in both Uganda and Congo! So, we hopped in our suits, jumped in the pool, and just stared out into the beauty until the sun set.

We woke up early the next morning as it's best to start a game drive as the sun comes up. It was only a matter of minutes after leaving the lodge that we began to see some wildlife. Monkeys, cape buffalo, and elephants! It was a bit overwhelming to take in the scenery, with not just the sun coming up, but also a storm approaching. There were so many colors and clouds - it's hard to describe, and the pictures never seem to tell the whole story. As we were driving through the savannah, I think what I found the most fascinating was the sound. It was very quiet, but when we came across the lions, we noticed something new. The kob (like gazelles), were whistling to one another, warning each other of the predator in the area. Not that the lionesses looked like predators. They were just waking up and saying good morning to each other, nuzzling one another. But then, we saw one begin to hunt and watched the "cat and mouse" game begin. Super fascinating to watch these animals in their natural habitat.

It's hard to see, but she has some breakfast in her mouth.

Something we did not plan on, but were incredibly thrilled to experience, was getting to cross the equator! Ok, so really, we just drove to it, took a bajillion pictures, and then turned around and went back to see more animals, but seriously… cool!

I call the next part of the drive, "the drive of the elephants"! We were fortunate enough to come across a large herd of elephants grazing around and in the road on the way to Mweya Lodge. Our safari car was more of a minivan, one in which there were tinted windows and one large sunroof that 2-3 people could fit through at a time. This meant that 2-3 people were always "stuck" in the car trying to look out the tinted windows. So, for part of the drive, we opened in the side door to get a better look. At one point, we were stopped and there was no good view of the elephants from the open door, so, I hopped out! I got some great shots, and then Dennis told me to get back in, so I did, after I got him to take my picture with some of the gorgeous beasts! We also got to see a baboon, a hippo, and a warthog along this road!

We had lunch at Mweya Lodge, a super expensive lodge, but it does have great views, and it is in the middle of the park. There is also a boat launch there where one can take a boat safari for the mere price of $15 US. If you are considering a trip to Queen Elizabeth, this is a must! We were able to get quite close to several elephants, hippos, and cape buffalo. We even saw some monitor lizards and crocodiles (but they are really shy)! Queen Elizabeth Park boasts ver 600 species of birds - we didn't see nearly that many, but we did see several kingfishers, pink heron, eagles, vultures, weavers, pelicans and even a pair of egyptian geese! There are villages inside the National Park, and so there are reports of fatalities due to the dangerous nature of these animals. At the end of our boat ride we passed one such village on a hill right next to the Kazinga Channel. There were little boys playing near the water as their fathers worked, not more than an hundred meters or so from some hippos. Hippos are the most deadly according to Park statistics. It's definitely a different way of life!

The next morning we packed and made our 7 hour journey back to Kigali. Hannah, Micki, and her parents stayed the night at Lake Bunyoni in Uganda, while my mom and I headed all the way back. We were able to hire a "private" matatu (think a little bigger than a VW bus in which there are normally about 20 passengers) to take us from the Rwandan border to our house. It was a pretty day and a nice drive back through the hills of Rwanda.

On Thursday I introduced my mom to Bourbon Coffee, Rwanda's version of Starbucks. Rwanda boasts some of the best coffee plantations, of which I have yet to see. Some of my friends visited a plantation in Butare (southern Rwanda) last week. This plantation's buyer is Starbucks and they have quite the operation! After our Bourbon excursion we walked home, and it was already time to pack. :( We packed up my mom's stuff (not much), our souvenirs (a decent amount), and some of my stuff (ok, a lot), so she had 3 full bags to take back with her. It was a long journey home (41 hours), but it was a safe one!

The reality of my time coming to a close here gets more apparent every day. My mom's trip has been something I have thought of as "towards the end" - and now that she's already back in the US, it's sinking in more. My walls are bare, and tables much less cluttered as I had her take home things I will not need in the next 6 weeks. It's both depressing and exciting all at once. In a few weeks the school has planned one last retreat for the teachers, one in which they plan to debrief us on our time here. I may also try to sneak in a trip to see the gorillas!

The theme of our chapel last week was Easter and we also emphasized some of the hymns we have been learning about. One of my (many) favorites is All Creatures of our God and King. It seems like a timely hymn for the adventure just experienced. The words were written almost 800 years ago by St. Francis of Assisi. There is a recording of the song on my mom's CD - if you haven't heard it, ask her for a copy, it's beautiful!!

All Creatures of Our God and King

All creatures of our God and King,

Lift up your voice and with us sing: Alleluia, Alleluia!

Thou burning sun with golden beam,

Thou silver moon with softer gleam,

O praise Him, O praise Him, Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

Thou rushing wind that art so strong,

Ye clouds that sail in heav’n along, O praise Him, Alleluia!

Thou rising morn in praise rejoice,

Ye lights of evening, find a voice,

O praise Him, O praise Him, Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

Let all things their Creator bless,

And worship Him in humbleness, O praise Him, Alleluia!

Praise, praise the Father, praise the Son,

And praise the Spirit, Three in One,

O praise Him, O praise Him, Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia!

Multiple-hat Day

You know those emails that go around reminding people of how teachers (and mothers) have to wear so many different hats? Beyond the day-to-day planning, teaching, managing and assessing, there is the addition of counseling, disciplining, and of course, trying to be a consistent positive role-model!

Today I feel like I exhausted all of those hats, not to mention the emotions that come with them. It was a roller-coaster type with many ups and downs.

Morning

We start the day with math everyday (because one of my students is pulled out for a different math class at that time). This should be a happy thing since I love teaching math, but I often find it frustrating as many of my students have yet to develop the ability to reason. Our math curriculum assumes this skill is well-developed by this time in the year, but it just isn't so. One of today's questions: There are 12 ice-cream sandwiches to be shared equally among 8 students. How many ice-cream sandwiches will each student receive? Now, you may think, like I did, that my students would struggle with coming up with the right operation, or which number divides which? Oh no… they were confused because they didn't know what an ice cream sandwich was! I wanted to laugh and cry. And of course, after I explained the delicious treat, they no longer wanted to do math, but talk about ice cream sandwiches.

After math we have time for devotions and prayer. This is always a good part of the morning that ends with singing. Today we read from 2 Timothy and sang "I will call upon the Lord". I love this time of day. I also love hearing my kids pray. They have very tender hearts and pray often for each other, their families, and the situations going on in the world (North Africa and Japan), and they truly get excited when they see their prayers answered.

Mid-Morning

This is the time of day I have Geometry. This class has grown on me throughout the year as I have developed relationships with the students. They still get on my nerves from time to time (and I'm sure I get on theirs!), but they are doing well and learning most days. Today was a really hard day though. There was a quiz, and as I was grading I became suspicious that one student cheated. I investigated and this student ended up admitting to me that he cheated. My heart just sank, because this is the second time he has been caught cheating in my class. KICS has a very strict cheating policy, which I wholeheartedly agree with, but this now means that this student fails my class and will re-take it next year. Yeah… such an unfortunate decision with huge consequences. Please pray with me for this young man that he can learn from this situation and become responsible in his education.

Afternoon

After lunch one of my sixth-grade boys came to class sobbing. Apparently he's been teased a lot because of a nickname his mom calls him (because another boy who went to play at his house overheard her). Now some high-schoolers had caught on and joined in the teasing. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?? It took this boy over 5 minutes just to calm his breathing down enough to tell me what happened. I felt terrible, but it did lead to a great conversation about where his true worth comes from, from God, from within, and not from others! He was able to return to class and get through the rest of the day, but believe you me, there was a high schooler who got an earful from me after school today. Picking on a kid three years younger… as if…

By the end of the school day I was feeling a bit weary and honestly had no idea what I was going to do with my kids for the last 20 minutes of the day. Then I remembered that our Bible lesson used the analogy of a soldier this week to compare to our Christian lives. I asked Trevor, my boss, if he wouldn't mind coming in at the end of the day to share some of his military experiences with us. He was a hit! Not only did he sneak attack our classroom and scare the daylights out our whole class, he had the kids on the edge of their seats for a full 20 minutes with great stories and messages about the benefits of obedience, knowing how to use our 'weapons' and keeping our eyes on the goal. We also learned how to use a bayonet: twist! twist! twist! ;D

Well, I'm home now, have had the afternoon to rest, and a chance to eat some dinner. Time to go to our school's Talent Show tonight. I hear some of the teachers are bringin' back the 80's! Can't wait to see this!

Praying for you my friends - hoping you find joy and peace no matter what hat you're wearing at the moment.

For Amy

My friend Amy informed me today that it's been a month since my last post. Time is just flying by too fast here.

The last month has been full of a little bit of everything: school, friends, and travels.

School

Today ended our third quarter. It is hard to accept that tomorrow begins the last term I will be at KICS. The kids celebrated today that summer vacation is within reach, and I nearly burst into tears. I told them they're not allowed to be excited about summer. ;) Overall school has continued to be a positive experience day by day as we teach the students and meet as a staff to develop plans for future growth. My daily highlight continues to be my students voices. We sing hymns each morning and I know this is their favorite time of day. They beg and plead, "can we please sing 'Blessed Assurance,' 'How Great Thou Art,' 'Amazing Grace,' and 'Behold What Manner of Love'!!" And then we sing from our hearts as loud as we can (we interrupted the fifth graders' lesson yesterday, but instead of asking us to take it down a notch, they just joined it!). Yep, I love my job.

Friends

I don't know what I would do without my friends here in Kigali. While I must admit that I'm a bit of a homebody, I do enjoy the occasional trip to town, night out to eat, or stroll to the coffee shop. My friend Micah and I try to get out once a week to do something like this, but lately we've been so busy (or sick) - it's been hard! Last weekend was just silly… my roommates and I are used to lazy Saturdays, but lazy is not a word to describe last Saturday. Micah and I planned to get donuts Saturday morning, but Friday night I had to change our plans… our friends Doug and Kerry were getting engaged and my roommates and I were asked to be part of that occasion! Well, obviously we were totally on board, but didn't realize how hard it would be to decline all the wonderful invitations to 'go to lunch' 'go shopping' 'have a game night', when friends called that morning. We weren't allowed to tell so we were like, "um… sorry, no. we're busy." "Why?! What else could you possibly be doing?" "um… well, were going out, so no." It was much more fun that evening to have everyone over to our house to celebrate Doug and Kerry's engagement!! (they're getting married in July)

Travels

I've been out of Kigali twice since my last blog. I was able to visit my friend Sharday in Nairobi, Kenya in February. We spent the weekend together, and I was able to see where she lives and studies at NEGST, as well as see a little bit of the city. My first thought when I flew into Nairobi was "this is Africa!". Not that Rwanda isn't, but Nairobi has more of the 'look' and 'feel' of what one might think when they think of Africa. There were lots of wide open spaces, and 'africa' trees, and even a warthog running through the street! I enjoyed going on the Safari Walk and visiting western shopping centers. The highlight of the trip though was the Giraffe Center! If you haven't seen it yet, check out my fb pictures of the trip - you'll get to see me meet a lovely giraffe named Arura, up close and personal!

We had a long weekend in early March so some girlfriends and I headed out to Kibuye on Lake Kivu. It was a nice relaxing weekend, full of rest and picturesque views. We stayed at a guest house called St. Jean's. I was pleasantly surprised at the comfort of such a simple place! The wait for food was the typical african hour-hour and half, but the portions were huge for the price we paid.

Back at home here I am constantly thinking about the future while trying to enjoy the present. As I said, time is just flying by fast! I am excited for my mom's arrival in less than 3 weeks! We are planning an adventure up to Uganda to Queen Elizabeth Park, as well as seeing the sights here in Kigali. My guess it my next post will come after that! :)

I hope you are well and blessed ~ thank you for reading!

Definitely going on the "Top Ten" highlights of my life!